


Irrationality

by somethingcleverimsure



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: But no real death, Canon Compliant, F/M, Mentions of Character Death, Most of VM is just in the background, Percy P.O.V, Percy is smitten
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-16
Updated: 2017-07-16
Packaged: 2018-12-02 20:30:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,053
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11516892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/somethingcleverimsure/pseuds/somethingcleverimsure
Summary: Percy's thoughts on the times where he is most irrational concerning everyone's favorite money hungry half-elf. Of course, maybe it isn't so irrational after all.





	Irrationality

**Author's Note:**

> I own nothing. Most of the dialogue, excluding from the first little blurb, is from the show because I wanted to keep this as grounded in canon as possible. Hope you enjoy!

Percival Fredrickstein von Musel Klossowski de Rolo III considered himself to be a rational being. He was a creature of logic, calculating every outcome and picking the one with the least risk, at least when it comes to other people. Percy doesn’t so much care about risk when it comes to himself, but even that can be backed up by his rational. What Percy cannot rationalize, is Vex- or rather his feelings for her.

 

It began when they found him in the cell after being captured by Ripley’s forces. He sees her first, and relief floods his system despite her unfamiliar face- a very irrational relief. She could easily be another one of Ripley’s associates, but something tells him that she isn’t. The one that looks like her picks his lock, and suddenly he has six new allies. Once he’s freed, Percy hands over every ounce of gold that he has to the half-elven girl. Her dark eyes light up, and her lips quirk up in a smirk. It’s an irrational action, the gold could be useful later when he parts ways with the group, but he feels a sense of satisfaction when he sees her eyes spark.

 

“Are you sure?” She asked, although even at the time Percy was sure she had no intention of giving the gold back.

 

“I’m sure you’ll get more joy of it than I ever will, money has caused me nothing but problems,” Percy rationalized, “Think of it as a thank you fee, for breaking me out of that cell.” 

 

“Well, if you need money, you need but ask,” She said, tossing a wink in his direction before turning her attention to the sack of gold he had given her and carefully counting then cataloging it in a weathered notebook that she carried. Her features softened slightly as she wrote down the sum on one of the pages, and if Percy was being honest, it was inexplicably endearing, “What’s your name, dear?”

 

“Excuse me?” Percy asked, bringing himself back to reality. 

 

“Your name, darling,” She repeated, looking up from the book, “For your account.” 

 

“Oh,” Percy said, a little off guard by the concept of having “an account” as if this were more than just a temporary arrangement, “It’s Percival- Percy.”

 

“Well, Percival- Percy,” She said, “Welcome to The Shits.” 

 

* * *

 

 

Percy ended up staying with The Shits much longer than he intended, in fact he never left. He had grown quite fond of the group now dubbed Vox Machina, and in it he had found an undefinable sense of family, which was something he would have thought was irrational when he first met them, but now was something he had become quite familiar with. Another thing a younger him would see as irrational is the close friendship he formed with the half-elven druid named Keyleth. She was Percy’s opposite in almost every way, despite her coming from a family of high status (high status in the ashari). She was young and naive when they first met, but as time goes on, he watches as battle hardened her, and he can’t help but place some of the blame on himself. He knows that he is blunt and tends to speak things as they are. But ultimately, these relationships are not irrational. 

What is irrational is the sheer amount of money he spends to make Vex happy. Of course he builds things for other members of the party, but he spends an unparalleled amount of time in his workshop tinkering away on a new arrow for Vex. Perhaps it’s because he knows he has to go to her if he wants money for these new inventions, and she always gets pouty when when he asks for more money than she’s willing to give. 

However, he thinks it has more to do with the familiar spark that lights behind her eyes when he gifts her with new arrow. More recently she’s been more open about her excitement over these gifts, telling him “I won’t even make you haggle for, I’ll just give it to you,” while tossing him a wink, making grabby hands whenever he presents her with a new arrow, and this last time she even pressed a kiss to his cheek. He would have been more surprised, if she wasn’t such a terrible flirt. She’s like that with everyone. 

Percy’s all too logical mind figures that the flush that comes to his face after the kiss is just as irrational as everything else Vex unwittingly makes him do. In fact Percy knows that the excess endearment he feels for Vex is irrational because Vex is… on another level. She’s free and clever and oh so lovely. She burns so bright, she might as well be the sun, but Percy is dark. Every thing he has ever known has dragged him into the shadows, and he can’t fathom a world where she would ever dime her light to be with him, nor a world where he could survive in the light. 

Yet, when he makes her those arrows, he is allowed a mere glimpse of the brilliant light that exudes from Vex’ahlia. He can pretend that this special privilege is irrational, but he knows the real irrationality is that even for these small moments, he pretends that he can contribute to her light. 

 

* * *

 

 

He had gotten far too comfortable. It felt like a strange mix of mere minutes and lifetimes since he told Vax “It’s good to find the things that are important to you and move towards them,”  and he foolishly believed he was right. After all they had been through- her unwavering support in their war on the Briarwoods, how she had given him a peck on the cheek and practically promised that they wouldn’t let him slip into the darkest parts of his soul. He remembers watching her almost die in Ziggurat at Lady Briarwood’s hand, and the absolute panic that strikes when they are unable to heal her. He catapulted himself off the platform so that she could be pulled up, injuring himself in the process. Some might say that doing that was irrational, that there were other ways of figuring it out, but all Percy remembered was the strong need to get Vex healed. 

She had kissed him again, after Scanlan had dissolved his gun in acid. All he could do was whine about how Scanlan was paying for a new one, but later that night it had struck him that she had actually kissed him. And of course the flirting got worse, she was always flirting, everything had lulled him into this irrational idea that he was somehow good enough to be hers. Then he got a reality check. 

She had been lying on the ground of that tomb, eyes glassy and unseeing, not breathing, and so very cold. It had been his fault, even after dragons had attacked, he was still lulled into this false sense of security, and had let his guard down. He didn’t let her check for traps, he was impatient, impulsive, and irrational, and she was dead because of him. He was useless, he couldn’t even help bring her back- the residuum he used shattered instantly, serving as both a rejection of his attempt to mend this wrong and as a cold reminder that despite being a talented tinkerer, he could not fix everything.                                        

Zahra and Her brother brought her back, and Vax sold himself to the Raven Queen in exchange for Vex. When she came back she was her usual self, a jolting contrast to the now deadly somber party. She asked if he set off the trap that killed her, and his voice is thick with regret and self disgust when he says yes. He retreated to his workshop and slaved over a new arrow for her- a siege arrow. Something that can represent exactly how shattered his world was at even the slightest suggestion of her death. He talked to Vax as well, one of the many apologies he has to make. He told Vax that he would not have been able to live with that mistake, especially since it was her. Vax punched him in his mouth, and it hurts more than he ever could have imagined, but it is not undeserved. Later he gave Vex the arrow. 

“This is An Evening of Unbridled Guilt,” He said when her eyes light up at the present, “Come here let me show you. In theory this is a siege arrow- shattering stones, shattering doors, breaking..things-”

“Breaking hearts left and right?” She interrupted, giving him one of her signature winks, which is far more than he deserved from her after all that he has destroyed. He’s caught off guard by just how lovely she is to him, even after everything.

“If that’s what you’re after,” He stammered, far more flustered than he should be, but she was there and smiling and that was more than enough at the moment, “Um… It should work. Never forget you’re my favorite, and I’m so sorry.” 

Vex kissed him when he handed over the arrow. She was always too kind to him, she even asked if he was sporting a black eye (which he was), but he just blames it on not sleeping well (which he didn’t). He doesn’t know why he lied, maybe it was to protect her, because that's all he wanted to do in the moment, even if he wasn’t that good at it.

 

* * *

 

 

Percy fucking hates that broom, even if he doesn’t really have a good reason to. Maybe it’s because it makes everything she does at least fifty percent more dangerous, but of course he would never say that. He hates that god awful broom, but within two minutes of seeing her fly around on it, he’s already spending more time thinking about it than he’d like to. She’s flying around, showing him that she can fly with no hands, and he’s already thought up the idea to attach a tether. She smiles while she teases him, and she looks genuinely happy, and he especially cannot begrudge her happiness. When she asks him to add a seat, he’s already pulling out his sketch book to design it. 

It’s later that lives up to his promise. He tells her that he’ll work on it, but Vex’ahlia was never one to back down easily, and so she joins him in the workshop. He is almost certain that having her there will result in some sort of horrible explosion, not because she’s likely to cause one, but Percy seems to be far less clever in her presence. Percy isn’t used to to things not happening exactly as he expects them, so he’s even less prepared when he’s absolutely wrong. Vex, as it turns out, is a quick learner and is very receptive. He only needs to tell her what something is once, and it isn’t too long after that before she starts passing him tools before he asks for them. By the end of the ordeal, Vex has a tether attached to her broom and is covered in the black powder that coats every surface. Somehow she is no less lovely.

“Percy,” She said, grinning like a madwoman, “I feel safer already.” 

“Yay to a constructive day,” Percy responded because he is always at a loss for words around Vex, “That was- You’re quite good at this. We should do it again sometime.” 

“I would love that,” Vex said. At her words, Percy can feel his heart and his breath catch. It’s ridiculous for such a simple statement to make him so flustered, but he finds he has trouble speaking when he responds. 

“Yes,” Percy says, “ This was- This was actually agreeable.”

The next time Percy works on the broom is the night before they venture into the Feywild and everyone else, including Vex, is having drinks. Vex had approached him, sounding far more nervous than she should have any right sounding when she’s asking Percy for a favor (when has he ever said no to her?). For a moment he thinks that it has to deal with something else entirely, but Percy’s never been great with those kinds of conversations. Percy insisted that Vex save him a drink, and she willingly promised, telling him not to lose any more sleep than he’s willing to over the broom. Percy isn’t willing to lose any sleep over the broom, but he’s willing to lose a fair amount for Vex, so he worked tirelessly until it’s completed. He can’t help but think that it’s completely irrational for him to be slaving away over this thing that he rather dislikes in the dead of night, but it makes her irrationally happy, so who is he to complain.

 

* * *

 

 

Percy has never seen her like this before. Vex- strong, wild, passionate Vex, is furiously polishing armor, as if she can polish away any imperfection in her life along with the imperfections in her armor. 

“Percy, change of subject,” She said after he’s thoroughly complained about what a shit Garmelie is. There is something off about her and it instantly catches his attention, “Would you say I look put together? Well-off? With this armor?”

“Uh- We- In what sense?” He responded, caught off-guard by the question. 

“Well you come from money, right?” She elaborated.

“Yes,” Percy prompted, still unsure of where this is going.

“Right,” Vex said, “So, um, do I look like I come from money?” It’s one of the few times Vex has ever seemed truly vulnerable. The most comparable time being after the dragons attacked, or when Pike died. Percy didn’t know what to do.

He looked at her quizzically for a moment, trying to think objectively, but he’s never objective when it comes to Vex. Percy has never been a fan of money- giving his away within hours of meeting her, but he has always liked Vex, even from the moment they met. He took in her appearance, less focused on the armor (and the hat- which certainly doesn’t look like something a rich asshole would own), and more on her.  Her eyes don’t hold the same light they normally do, and that stung in a way he never could have imagined. What struck him most were the deep smile lines she has, the product of all the good moments that Vox Machina has had together, and the product of that which Percy strives to inspire. 

“Honestly, dear, you’re too happy to look like you come from money,” Percy said, he could feel his features softening as he said it. Vex let out a harsh, joyless laugh, and Percy was at a loss. 

“I don’t believe that,” She said, as she brushed a few fallen tears from her face, the harsh laugh still coloring her words.

“No, a sure sign of it is just abject misery. Believe me, I can speak to it,” Percy assured, “You look too much like you, and you don’t look enough like something you’re supposed to be. Um, if you feel the urge to deeply bullshit, I’d be happy to help you, it’s not hard.” 

“No?” Vex asked, voice small. She furiously wiped more tears from her eyes, and Percy wanted to do nothing more than to hold her tight, wipe away those tears, and provide the comfort that he knew he never could. 

“No.” Percy said gently. He looked to Vex, who was still desperately trying to wipe the tears from her eyes, and resolved to do anything to see her smile once again, “It is easy to pretend you come from money. You just have to be a bit of a shit, and wear what everyone else is wearing.” It worked a little and he was content for the moment, but the light had yet to return to her eyes, and he something within himself urged him to fix this. “ … Um, does this have something to do with that city?” 

He waited for her to respond, but she just sighed and wiped more tears from her face. He an irrational hatred for every person that lives in that city boiled in his blood. She kept silent, but Percy knew that her silence spoke louder than anything. 

“It does, doesn’t it?” He asked when she still didn’t speak, “Who’s there?”

“Well, you know- everyone,” She said, a weak smile on her face, as if she were trying to hide her tears. Percy hated it, he hated that Vex’ahlia felt like she had to pretend, especially for a bunch of upperclass shits that have their noses too far in the air to even begin to see the pure radiance that is Vex’ahlia. She let out another joyless laugh and began blotting at her eyes again, “We were judged growing up, and I- I don’t look forward to seeing that again.”

“Well,” Percy sighed. He was angry, but he couldn’t let Vex see that. He was angry at these people, and with every word that Vex said, his anger only grew, but it wasn’t quite as strong as his desire to see Vex sure of herself once more.

“It’s not important,” Vex amended after a long pause, “I’m-”

“Oh, I disagree,” Percy interjected, “I think- Dear, I think- I think that if you’re worried about them knowing whether or not you’ve made your money- made your fortune- I don’t think that’s going to be the thing to earn their respect. I think you’re better off- A, with the company that you keep and B, with the fact that you’re probably just better than most of them. I’ve known a lot of people with money, and they are definitely not worth you.”

Percy watched Vex closely as he spoke, hoping for some sort of sign that he hadn’t just been making everything worse. He got his sign when at the last thing he said, Vex gives a small smile. It’s the first genuine one he’s seen from her during this entire conversation. 

“And besides,” He added, hoping to coax another smile from her, “If they have something nice that makes you feel inferior, we can just take it.” 

“I like the way to think,” Vex laughed. Her voice was a little hoarse, so wasn’t the vibrant laugh she usually gave, but it was genuine, and that’s enough. 

“Well, and then they’re just shit without anything, and then you’re you with their stuff,” Percy said.

“Thank you, Percy,” Vex said in a barely there voice. His heart ached. Her soft voice almost broke him, he hated hearing her voice as anything other than loud and confident. 

“You’re welcome. I know it doesn’t really help,” He offered, “But-”

“Will you stay at my side when we’re there?” Vex asked, almost unsure. She looked back at him, her eyes red from crying. He noted the tear stains than ran down her cheeks. He thought it was silly how she didn’t know that he would do anything for her (and even more silly that she would think he would want to be anywhere but her side).

“Yes,” He said, “Yes.” He paused for a moment, desperate to think of a way to lighten the heavy mood. “And- the outfit works, don’t change it- keep the hat.” 

Alight,” She said, smiling wide and giving a small laugh. Percy felt his heart swell, he was not a romantic, but her laughter is better than any music he could imagine, “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight,” He echoed. They agreed to sort out the Garmelie mess later,and part ways. Percy knew that Vex didn’t go to sleep, and he honestly couldn’t blame her, but the thought of her sitting up all night and polishing that armor unsettled him. He knew that he had to do something.  

 

* * *

 

 

“So this grants an audience for all of us then?” Percy asked, doing his best to hide the smug look on his face as he addressed Syldor Vessar. 

“Yes,” Syldor answered.

“Um, you’re going to have to amend that one name, though, just to be fair,” Percy said, giving his best royal douche impersonation, “It’s  _ Lady _ Vex’ahlia.”

“Lady?” Syldor asked, looking surprised. Percy caught a glimpse of Vex out of the corner of his eye. She was certainly paying attention, but it looked as if she didn’t quite understand what he was doing just yet. 

“Lady Vex’ahlia, Baroness of the third house of Whitestone, and Grand Mistress of the Grey Hunt,” Percy elaborated, making sure to make direct eye contact with Syldor during the  entire title. His once stoic face was now set in a scowl, and Percy had to suppress the smirk that was spreading across his face, “So good Sir, despite your relationship with her, do watch your manners.”

Vex was now looking very much surprised, but he couldn’t determine if that was a good thing or a bad thing. A voice in the back of Percy’s mind scolded him for pulling such a trick without consulting Vex first, and under normal circumstances he would have, but they hadn’t had time to talk alone since their talk last night. 

“My apologies, Lady Vex’ahlia,” Syldor said, regaining his composure as Vex regained hers as well.

“Well, you didn’t know,” Vex replied, in a remarkably noble tone. Percy could see the ghost of a smile appear across Syldor’s lips at his daughter’s response. 

“I will make the amendment immediately,” Syldor promised, taking the scroll form Percy. 

“Thank you good sir,” Percy said, laying on the false politeness thickly. The rest of the meeting went as well as anyone expected it to go. Syldor brought back the amended scroll, and said that he would send forces to the frontline of their battle with the dragons. The party was able to impart some lasting wisdom on Velora as well, and Percy smiled as he watched the twins say goodbye to their sister, the whole scene was rather endearing. Then, of course, Vax and Grog start swearing in front of her and they have to go. 

As the door swung shut behind them, Vex ran up to Percy enveloping him in a huge hug, a wide grin on her face. She looked as if she’s about to explode from happiness, “Percival!” She said. 

“It’s the gift of smugness, it never goes away,” Percy said, as she pulled away.

“Wait,” She said, talking over him, “Wait, no- was it all just a-”

“No,” Percy said quickly upon seeing her face fall slightly, “I- It actually occurs to me that we did kill two of the three Barons of Whitestone the last time that we were there.” Vex chuckled slightly at that comment, and Percy couldn’t help but break his demeanor as well, “So-” Percy tried to continue but he was at a loss for words on what to say after that. Vex and the rest of the group were all laughing, so Percy just did a bunch of vague hand gestures to convey the tone of ‘well it’s true.’ “There’s no house, and there’s no money, and there's-”

“Scanlan- It’s the one Scanlan burned,” Keyleth added helpfully. The rest of the group made sounds of recognition.

“It’s the one that Scanlan burned-” Percy confirmed.

“You’re the Lady of the house of the house that I- I burned down,” Scanlan said, looking all to pleased with himself for his past actions. 

“There’s just a crypt,” Percy interrupted, wishing now more than ever that his friends would shut up, “But that’s being used for other things. But-”

“But you have a title!” Keyleth cheered, interrupting Percy once again.

“But you do have a title,” Percy said softly, looking at Vex who was looking at him with her brilliant, bright eyes, “At the very least, and once a year you have to do something ridiculous.” 

“Even so,” Vex said speaking over Percy before pausing and waiting for him to stop, “Even so, Percy-” She placed her hands on his face to get him to look at her. 

“Your welcome,” Percy said without even waiting for Vex to thank him. Her proximity has him a little flustered. 

“I thank you so much,” She said, smiling softly at him. 

“Use it in good health,” He added good naturedly. Vex quickly kissed him on the lips, barely even listening to him anymore (although he can’t blame her because he has a tendency to ramble). Percy melted, like he always does when Vex shows any kind of affection to him. Maybe, for once, Percy’s irrational and impulsive behavior resulted in good. Vex stepped back from Percy, still smiling, and Percy was sure that there was no maybe about it. 

  
  


He didn’t know why he didn’t pull his gun sooner. He just sat there, jaw set and rooted to the floor, while that creepy assshole hissed fowl things at her. He calls her selfish, which she is not. He says that she would let her friends die for her own personal gain, which she would never do. However, Vex’ahlia seems to believe every word that comes out of Saundor’s mouth. 

“ I could give you the means to protect them, your home,” Saundor offered. 

“What would you ask in return?” Vex asked, sounding almost desperate, as if she were considering it. Percy wanted to step forward and get it through her head that none of them were worth her giving this asshole what he would ask for, but he stayed rooted to his spot watching in a mix of horror and anger. 

“Your heart.” He hissed. There was almost an finality to the statement, and Percy found himself shaking his head, pleading with Vex not to take this thing’s offer. However, Vex didn’t see him. 

She leaned forward, a deadly look in her eye, “My heart is someone else’s,” She said, drawing her bow. 

“All I ask is one who knows my pain,” Saundor said, crescendoing with each word, before dropping quiet when he said, “What is your answer?” Vex loosed her arrow, and the rest of the party followed suit. 

It wasn’t until after the fight that Percy was able to think straight again. The minute after Grog had destroyed that asshole, Vex started apologizing, half hysterical, to the rest of the party. Keyleth had gone over to Vex and was telling her that Saundor was an asshole and that she didn’t have to listen to him. Percy sauntered over to them.

“We’re a lot a like, you and I,” He said, comically mocking Saundor’s douchery, both Keyleth and Vex laughed, “BLEEEEEEGGHHHHH.” Vex was laughing harder and now Keyleth was joining in on his impersonation, “What an asshole.”

“You drug your friends to their doom,” Keyleth said mimicking Percy’s tone.

“EERRRRAAAGGGHH,” Percy added for good measure, just to make sure that Vex’s smile remained on. They looted the asshole’s lair, and left quickly, not wanting to stay behind too long. However, as they walked back through the tunnel they entered through, Percy couldn’t help his mind returning to something Vex had said when she was confronting Saundor. 

“My heart is someone else’s,” She had said, surely lying to the creep to get him to leave her alone.

“My heart is someone else’s,” She had said, surely speaking in the platonic sense about her brother or her bear, two beings that had been by her side countless times, whom she loved deeply.

“My heart is someone else’s,” She had said, surely talking about anyone but him. Vex was such a beautiful person, she could be talking about anyone, and most anyone Vex would give her heart to would deserve it far more than he would. 

“My heart is someone else’s,” She had said, and in that moment an irrational hope had sprung in Percy’s heart. Percival was not an idiot, he knew that it could be anyone, but he also knew there was a slim chance it might be him. He couldn’t let himself hope, though, hope of her would be his undoing. 

“My heart is someone else’s,” echoed in his head until he slept much, much later. 

 

* * *

 

 

“I should have told you, it’s your’s,” A voice Percy would recognize even in death echoed around him. It’s silly, really. He died, and he should have been content with that. He had forgiven his demons, both literal and figurative, Keyleth had pulled Orthax off of his soul, and he had never really been one for living, so he should have been fine with dying. But Vex is sad, he can tell by her voice that she’s been crying, and in both life and death, Percy handle when Vex is sad, especially when he’s the cause. Of course, that’s not the only reason Percy’s coming back, there’s loads of unfinished business- like dragons, for instance. However, it’s the thought of making Vex happy that pulls the strongest.  

Percy took in a deep breath, coming to, the memories of the other side hazy and dreamlike, but one thing still rang clear. A small hand was slapping his face, and he ensnared it using his glove of missile grabbing.He turned to look at Scanlan, opening his eyes, and then he looked around the room, catching a glimpse of her. She was standing behind her brother, her hands covering her mouth as she laughed a shaky laugh of relief. Vax, was standing over him, from where he had just cast lay on hands.

“Welcome back,” She said, as he opened and closed his mouth, trying to catch his breath, but also trying to think of something to say to any of them. She remained remarkably quiet for the rest of the conversation, and Percy was too busy with other things (like his sister) to really pay attention to her, but there were a few moments where he caught her smiling to herself. Then Grog had to ruin it by asking him what he remembered. He looked over at her, her face full of questions, but he decided that talk was a talk to be had without an audience. 

“Nothing… worth repeating,” He said slowly, watching something flash in her eyes for just a moment before she was back to normal. 

“I beg to differ,” Keyleth said carefully, noticing Percy’s preoccupied disposition. Scanlan changed the subject, bringing everyone back to laughter, and nearly making Percy promise him one of his guns. Percy paused for moment to thank Keyleth for what she did. 

“How do you- what do you- what what?” Keyleth asked, clearly perplexed. 

“I saw what you did,” Percy clarified. 

“What do you mean you saw what I did?” Keyleth asked. 

“It was the only thing I saw,” Percy explained, technically it wasn’t a lie. After all, he didn’t see Vex, he heard her. 

“Did you hear me yell for you?” Keyleth asked.

“No,” Percy said, he hadn’t heard anyone aside from Vex. Vex, who looked more than a little hurt. Of course she was trying to hide it, but Percy knew her too well, “But I saw your hand. Thank you.”

He noticed the hurt in her eyes again when he told them about Keyleth ridding him of Orthax. He told them there was Orthax, then Keyleth, then nothing, then there. He saw Vex’s face fall when he said “nothing,” but what else could he do? Then there was no time to talk about anything else, as a wall of exhaustion hit Percy like a ton of bricks. He retired to his room, more preoccupied with getting better than anything else. 

It had been sometime since he had been revived, and Percy was not stupid. He could tell that a dynamic had shifted between him and Vex. Everyone else could too. He couldn’t put his finger on it until that moment in the library, where it seemed as if she couldn’t wait to get away from him, even though he knew that wasn’t the case. He wondered if she would ever say anything to him, or if she just wanted it all to go away since she thought he didn’t remember? Whatever his intention was with keeping that information private, Percy certainly didn’t want this be the outcome. 

She pulled him away from where Scanlan had been writing his name in the snow, and He honestly couldn't have been more in love with her. At least that was what he thought until she started talking about forgiveness, and how he taught her that the only way to grow was to forgive yourself. That she believed that so much so she carved it into her bow.

“You have to forgive him too,” Vex said, “Because everything you’ve suffered and endured and created in that time, has made you into the person you are now.”  The words that had brought him back from the dead echoed in his head, “And you have a brilliant mind.” She paused again, “And any darkness that might cloud your vision on occasion- the fact that you found it within yourself to forgive her means that it will never overtake you.” She watched his face intently, an inferno burning behind those bright eyes of hers that Percy adores so much. 

“Thank you,” He said, desperately searching for something more to say, “I would like to think we’re all better than we think we are… except maybe you’re brother, he’s just a mess.”

“He’s terrible isn’t he,” Vex said, smiling at his joke, “The worst.” The awkward tension that had been between them since he died melting away. 

“Is he here?” Percy asked, looking around for some sign of an invisible Vax. 

“Maybe,” Vex said, holding back a wide grin, “Probably… hiding somewhere.” 

“Shouldn’t have given him that ring,” Percy muttered, and Vex laughed again, more beautiful than any music Percy had ever heard. He paused, before swallowing his pride, “Thank you.” He said earnestly, “ I know, I know, I have to forgive myself. I’m not quite there yet, but I can see a path. And I like where we are and what we’re doing, and I think that we’re the right people, in the right place, at the right time.”

“I agree,” Vex said, before pointing to her bow, “And this, this engraving is a reminder that every time I attack it’s not out of vengeance.” Percy took in the woman before him, astonished with all that she had accomplished since the Feywild. 

“I would horrified if you were taking yourself too seriously,” He said, smiling down at her. 

“Never,” She agreed, “Did you see the bear that I carved on the tree? It was quite lovely.” 

“It was quite lovely,” Percy echoed, “I don’t know if the tree is quite as happy with it, but I was quite impressed.” But when was Percy ever anything but impress with Vex’ahlia? 

“Thank you,” She said softly, almost as light as the snowfall around them. Small snowflakes stuck in her dark hair, the effect was striking. 

“Thank you,” Percy said, his mind racing. There was so much he needed to say to her, even more after their talk, and yet there was so much that he didn’t know how to say. But one look at her, with her soft eyes, made a huge smile spread across his face. He flushed a little and snorted out in laughter, as did Vex, who was also now sporting a huge grin to match Percy’s. 

“That was all,” Vex said, quietly, as if she’d disrupt the balance they had just reached if she spoke any louder. Percy watched as she returned her eyes to the ground, looking away from him. She threaded a strand of hair that had sprung from her braid behind her ear. He was struck by the fact that this ethereal being believed he was deserving of forgiveness, and struck even more so by the fact that she had given him her heart. And what had he done about it? Nothing. All this time Percy thought he was being irrational by falling more and more in love with Vex’ahlia, that it was irrational to think that she could ever return the sentiment to the likes of him. However, he’s been irrational backing away- in fact, he’s probably only hurt her more, and if there’s one thing Percy hates, it’s seeing Vex’ahlia in any kind of pain. So before he left he did the least irrational thing he’s ever done when it comes to Vex. 

He kissed her. 

**Author's Note:**

> There will probably be another part to thins with events post kiss, but it's not something that needs to be read with the first part so I didn't make it multi-chaptered. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the story! Thank for reading. Comments and constructive criticism are always welcomed and appreciated. I write these at like four in the morning so please let me know if I made any mistakes.


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